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Chuck Norris News

Hunter Pence stars in a parody rap video about Hunter Pence Signs 11:00 Sep 15 2014 from Yahoo! Sports

Lest you thought the Hunter Pence Signs joke was something that died after mid August — you know, like the Oakland Athletics' chances of winning the AL West, zing! —  the bleacher meme has inspired a new parody rap video. We like parody rap videos an...


Children of Man Fatally Shot By 9-Year-Old Girl Release Statement 08:30 Sep 13 2014 from Jezebel

Last month, a 9-year-old girl fatally shot her shooting instructor with a fucking Uzi because apparently the goddamn Delta Force (starring Chuck Norris) is hiring children. The family of the instructor Charles Vacca are obviously still reeling from h...


Starship Troopers beat Aliens, Robots AND Chuck Norris to WIN in a FIGHT 09:00 Sep 13 2014 from The Register

Pirates, Ninjas, Klingons trounced Weekend Big Data   The Big Data has spoken, and has answered the Great Question of pub/water-cooler debate: Who Would Win In A Fight?...


Friday's Freak Show – 9/12/14 04:49 Sep 12 2014 from YouGabSports

Well folks, this will be a bit piecemeal today, bare with me: .  Looking forward to watching a few games, particularly South Carolina/Georgia, UCLA/Texas, and Tennessee/Oklahoma. Hey Jeff, what's the deal with Eric Dickerson slammning the bleep out o...


Alien Ninja Fembot Pirates vs the Jedi SAS Chuck Norris startroopers: RUMBLE 07:28 Sep 06 2014 from The Register

Machine Gun Jubblies! Weekend Big Data Project   So we're finally ready: it's time to bring down the mighty hammer of Big Data on the invulnerable nut of knowledge that has remained uncracked by a million arguments in pubs. That is, who would win in ...


On Icelandic Pronunciation 08:11 Sep 05 2014 from Climateer Investing

A couple points of background. From Urban Dictionary: icelandic the real most bad-ass scandinavians...so bad-ass they got kicked out of normal scandinavia. they make chuck norris look like a small child. Smart people don't fuck with the Icelandic. Ce...


Ninja Pirate Zombie Vampires versus Chuck Norris and the Space Marines 04:03 Aug 29 2014 from The Register

Harvest of Brains Weekend Big Data Project   No fewer than 1,784 of you kindly volunteered to have your brains slurped in the initial stage of the Weekend Register 's pioneering attempt to use hefty-data techniques to solve the most pressing puzzle o...


Ad of the Day: Van Damme Awesomely Sculpts a Mountaintop Ice Bar for Coors Light 12:55 Aug 25 2014 from Brandweek

Jean-Claude Van Damme is still ice cold, but also still not as frosty as a Coors Light, says the brewer. It's been more than two years since the Gen X icon philosophized about his tight, frozen pants and post-coital penguin walks, from a snowy mounta...


GSP issues Chuck Norris the ice bucket challenge and creates the opportunity to end the debate about its value 07:25 Aug 20 2014 from MiddleEasy

Like a benevolent form of Ebola, the ice bucket challenge has spread to Canada. That’s because almost every single human being in the United States has already done it or risked being purged from the social media herd for being a failed virtual phila...