n18
NEWS|LOL 
   |

About author

The LOL-ster

The LOL-ster

Of wisecracks, giggle-fests and all things that tickle your funny bone

The world's largest democracy is having trouble. Over the past few years, we have suffered from dishonest politicians, megascams, embarrassing infrastructure problems, brutal rapes, apathetic people, a non-performing cricket team, and Ra.One. In the past three months, this has intensified. Ever since the Delhi gang-rape and the subsequent lack of action, and now gags on free speech, it seems like India is slowly changing into something different.

Into Somalia, to be precise. Somalia is the best example we have of a failed state, and it's scary that we share many characteristics with the disgrace of Africa. Here is a list of how we are similar, and what we need to change before bad things happen.

1. Lack of freedom of speech: If you say anything that hurts anyone's feelings, they can clap you in jail or ban your movie, or even kill you. This is a lot like Somalia, where they will burn you and kill your goats (and your family) if you say something offensive. Can you tell the difference?

2. Dynastic politics: In Somalia, there is a rich tradition of tribal warlords who kill and rape, and die within a few years, only to be succeeded by their sons, who do the same thing again and again, for ever. In India, our politicians do pretty much the same, only they also get garlanded and semi-worshipped. Sounds familiar?

3. Corruption: It is said that power corrupts. It could be changed to India corrupts - people at every level of society think only of how they can defraud everyone they deal with, and get a little money on the side. Any Somalian would find this frame of mind familiar; corruption is their national pastime, it would be the basis of their constitution, if they had one.

Somalia

Will this be our state in a few years? Photo courtesy: Fugly.com

 

4. Violence against women: In Somalia, women are treated as commodities, they are sometimes bought and sold, and are generally not respected. But no woman in Somalia was brutalized with  an iron rod inside a private bus, no religious leaders in Somalia said that the women were responsible for their own plight. India seems like its worse for women on this dimension.

5. Mute leaders: Somalia has figureheads in seats of power, puppets as their Presidents, rubber stamps as their heads of state. None of these people ever dare to speak out against the hellish state of their country, because that's a quick way to get killed by a warlord. We aren't drawing a parallel with MMS here, but you've got to admit he doesn't speak much...

6. Economy in trouble: Somalia's economy is like your great-great-great-grandparents; it died many years ago. The prices of basic commodities increase like the number of incomplete sentences on an Arnab Goswami interview. Inflation is a fact of life in Somalia, and we have all felt it in our lives in India.

7. Pirates: Somalia's greatest export - its pirates - have their counterparts in India, too. Rapidshare and torrents give us all our music, movies, TV shows, and porn. India might not have universal net connectivity, but every person with a net connection is a pirate. Just like in Somalia, where every person with a gun and a dream is a pirate.

Any other similarities you can see between India and Somalia? Tell us in the Comments Section!

Tag : #corruption #india #pirates #Somalia #Freedom of Speech #Dynastic politics

LOL: Reasons why team India lost the World T20 finals

from in.com

LOL: Reasons why team India lost the World T20 finals

What was the reason that an almost-perfect looking team India surrendered to the Lankan lions in the WC finals, you ask? Here are 5 probable reasons why we feel India lost:


LOL: How team India can win matches abroad

from in.com

LOL: How team India can win matches abroad

India is a tiger at home, and a bacterium abroad. After our embarrassing performances in South Africa and New Zealand, questions are being asked about whether our team is truly ready to play a cricket match anywhere outside the sub-continent. We think there is light at the end of the tunnel - we think that these 6 ideas will help India rise from the ashes and become a tiger everywhere.

What crazy thing will Justin Bieber do next?

from in.com

What crazy thing will Justin Bieber do next?

We're so worried about his recent string of crazy activities that we think he might go too far soon. He might do one of these things, for instance:

5 celebs we want to see Arnab interview

from in.com

5 celebs we want to see Arnab interview

After Arnab Goswami took Rahul Gandhi’s case in an interview (there’s really no other way of putting it) on Monday, we think that Koffee with Karan is way too boring. If we wanted to know random celeb gossip, we’d just read their tweets. But the way Arnab grills people, you have to admire him

Why did Jai Ho fail to break box office records?

from in.com

Why did Jai Ho fail to break box office records?

A few days after Jai Ho's release, it is apparent that Salman's latest film will not touch the heights achieved by Chennai Express, Krrish 3, or Dhoom 3. It might not even touch Dabangg-2 or Bodyguard, and this is in 2014, when every other film hits 100 crores domestically. So why did Jai Ho fail to break all the box office records we thought it would? We aren't sure, but here are a few reasons.

Implications of WiFi on Air India aircraft

from in.com

Implications of WiFi on Air India aircraft

Air India finally did something to make us sit up and take notice. They announced that they would provide wi-fi facilities to people on board their aircraft. This is great, but we don't think they've thought through some of the funnier consequences of their decision.

And the Jai Ho LOL-scars go to...

from in.com

And the Jai Ho LOL-scars go to...

There are three constants in life in India: the petrol prices will keep rising, Arnab and Manmohan will always be opposites, and Salman Khan movies will always stick to a formula. Whether he's a cop, a bodyguard, or an Aam Aadmi, he's basically Rajinikanth in a different body.