We have just been drubbed by England in the second test, and we have only ourselves to blame for our misery. I mean, we have only Dhoni to blame for our misery. He famously (publicly) asked the curators at Wankhede to prepare a spinning wicket, something that would give Ojha, Ashwin and Bhajji something to sink their teeth into. Unfortunately, the England spinners sunk their teeth in a little deeper, kind of like in Twilight, and levelled the series 1-1.
Dhoni's words illustrate that one must always be careful what one wishes for, and that one must always be careful before speaking. Here are a few more things that people (might have) said, that happened to blow up spectacularly in their faces:
"OK, I'll do an on-screen kiss. After all, how hard can it be to kiss Katrina convincingly?"
- Shah Rukh Khan
Even this public peck had more feeling than Khan and Kaif's smooch in Jab Tak Hai Jaan. Photo: AFP
"I've been a music director so long. Why don’t I try my hand (and chins) and acting, for a change?"
– Bappi Lahiri
"My video for Baby is going to be the most viewed video on youtube for ever. The only way anyone can ever beat it is if a Korean who looks like Kim Jong Un, drops out of the Berkley College of Music, thinks for 10 years of how to make a superhit, and then decides that acting like a horse will get him 832 million views. And that’ll never happen, right?"
– Justin Bieber
Psy of 'Gangnam Style' fame at a press conference. Photo: AFP
"Let me tweet about Bal Thackeray"
– Digvijaya Singh
"Let me file a written complaint"
– Rakhi Sawant
Rakhi Sawant and Digvijay Singh are truly two peas in a pod
"If we make an equal number of wrong umpiring decisions against both teams, it'll cancel out and we can make up for our incompetence"
– Aleem Dar and Tony Hill
"Let me make a public post on Facebook that does not show the right level of reverence to every leader in India with a sizeable following"
– 90% of the people in an Indian jail, very soon
"I want a timepass movie. Light entertainment. Life of Pi seems like a good fit. The name is short"
– Someone who’s shortly going to receive a rude shock
Life of Pi is, by no means, a light watch
"I need work. Let me go act as the villain in a Rajinikanth movie"
– Any suicidal actor
Leaked! Team India's resume
The Congress needs action. Faced with a formidable opponent led by a decisive, steely-eyed foe, they are in tatters. Sonia Gandhi has announced that she will soon announce the PM candidate for the Congress in 2014, and many names are already doing the rounds.
This weekend, a huge global blockbuster is releasing. No, not the Hobbit Part 2, why would you think that? We refer, of course, to a film which is sure to be a masterpiece, Sunny Leone’s second big Bollywood outing, the one and only 'Jackpot'
The Congress Party cannot be happy right now. After contesting in 5 states over the past few weeks, they are winning just one, the smallest of the bunch. In the others, their seat share stands at a pitiful, exam-failing 21%. Heads will roll, strategies will be debated, RaGa will emerge unscathed.
R...Rajkumar is bad. We don’t wish to spend too much time on using words to explain how bad it is because it is movies like this which prove that every second of your life is precious. Spending it on R...Rajkumar is a huge mistake. Right from the inexplicable use of fullstops in the title to the insanity that went into writing the dialogues, R...Rajkumar had us thinking about all the bad things that happened in our lives, and how they actually become good when compared to whatever it was that Prabhu Dheva was attempting.
As the economy keeps inflating, so do Bollywood collections. In no time, they’ll each be making the equivalent of the cost of one onion! We predict that the upcoming Dhoom 3 will make 300 crore. Here’s why:
Following elections in Delhi yesterday, exit polls point to the fact that the Congress is going to lose, and pretty badly. What a surprise. Not. Considering the Congress’ performance over the past few months, we’re sure pretty much ANYONE could have beaten them. Here are a few examples:
It's December, and that means we are in the holy month when Rajinikanth was born. On December 12, the man will turn 63, and his trillions of fans are